No Facebook Spoken Here

I deactivated my Facebook page last week. I did it because I stupidly clicked on something a friend sent that was bogus, which hijacked my friends list and sent the same stupid message out.

I was embarrassed by my stupidity (get my drift? I felt stupid because I know better) and in an attempt to stop it from going further, I deactivation my account. I don't even know if it stopped it but I felt I had to remove myself anyway.

I know with a few clicks I can reactivate the account. When I took that step I figured I would go back eventually but the longer I go 'deactivated' the better I like it.

I know Facebook is a time sucker, (Pam's phrase and so appropriate) but I didn't realize how much of a time sucker it was for me. Let me not be too dramatic but I feel a bit of freedom.

For the record I did create a Twitter account but have never used it. I don't think anyone cares if I'm having coffee, a sandwich or in the bathroom. And I can't compete with Ashton Kutcher's followers so what's the point?

Honestly there are some good ways to use Facebook. It has gotten me back in touch with several friends from high school and even a couple from childhood. That's pretty neat but after "Hi, how are you?" there's not much else to say, at least on Facebook. If we were face to face there might be more but I have lived without these people for nearly 40 years (oh gawd, did I write that??) so what's the big draw now? I don't even go to high school reunions.

Let me think about some of the positives about Facebook:

1. It reminds me of birthdays. That's nice but I can remember the most important ones on my own.
2. I did learn that Paul's cousin was in the hospital. That was a big one, although I assume they would have called before long.
3. It's let me offer words of comfort and concern to people. I can do that with a card or a phone call.
4. It has given me an opportunity to see some photos that I wouldn't otherwise. That's a loss, but I'll survive.
5. It gave me a chance to share some of my blog posts. I didn't do it regularly so no great loss.

Some people in my business stress the importance of social networking and recommend having a Facebook page. So I guess I'm losing that connection with some of my younger clients but I'll risk that. So there are some positives but nothing life altering.

But the one really important positive of NOT having a Facebook page is that it frees up some time and creativity (that may be a stretch) to spend writing and keeping up with some of the blogs I have neglected. Far more valuable ways to spend my time.

Just now when I ran spell check on this post, the word Facebook came up as a misspelled word. That tells me something right there.

Nurture vs. Nature

Have you been following the story about John Barnes of Michigan who thinks he's actually Steven Damman the little boy who was abducted in 1955 at the age of 2? A real-life Cold Case, it's a fascinating story about a toddler who was taken from outside a store in Long Island and never found. More than 50 years later John Barnes, who says he never felt like he belonged to his family, tracked down the sister of the little Damman boy and had a DNA test done. The results of that test say they 'could' be siblings. The police file has now been reopened and the FBI is involved and doing their own DNA testing. The results, which supposedly will have the definitive answer of who's who, won't be done for a couple months. I can't wait to hear the end of this story.

I have always been fascinated by genetics. Not the actual science but just what I can observe in people. Maybe this comes from the fact that I have no siblings or biological children of my own. I have 6 first cousins but only one (our mothers were full sisters) that I think I look like. I love it when I have the chance to see children of people I knew as children and have the opportunity to watch their kids to see not just physical resemblances but mannerisms that remind me of their parents.

I recently had the chance to spend the afternoon with the half-sister of a long-time friend of mine. I had not seen D since she was about 17 and she's now 37. I've known her half-brother since we were in 6th grade but they did not grow up together. They never spent much time together, and I don't believe they've even seen each other in over 25 years.

I found D on Facebook and was thrilled when she accepted my Friend request. I wasn't sure she would remember me. We exchanged a few emails and then got together for lunch. While we visited and chatted for a few hours I was stunned when I saw mannerisms and expressions that were just like her brother! A couple times it was so distinctive that I was a little distracted from the conversation, and I wonder whether she wondered what I was staring at! I never told her what I was thinking but maybe I will send her a link to this post and see what she has to say.

As I said, genetics is a fascinating subject for me, and it really makes me think about what is in that red stuff coursing through our veins.


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