Um, Like, I mean, Like Um, Ya Know Like, I mean

Recently I've had several conversations with a woman who says I mean at least three times in any sentence. In between I mean she sprinkles Um, Like and then, of course, Um Like. I know that some teenagers tend to use like and you know a little too often but this woman is 50-some years old.

Conversing with her is downright painful. I want to scream Get to the point! She's a business associate so she's not someone I can take aside and gently suggest she not speak until she has her thoughts more composed.

I don't sound like William F. Buckley but I have worked on my speech for many years. I am a born and bred New Englander, specifically Rhode Island. There are several different accents to be found in this one little state of only one million people. Most are not very pleasant to listen to and often ridiculed, usually by the rest of us.

I have tried to 'neutralize' my accent. I focus on pronouncing the G's in words ending in i-n-g. I try to put my R's where they belong and keep them out where they don't belong. My favorite example of both is Columbee-er Rivuh. Seriously, that's how many RhoDyLanduhs say Columbia River. I could go on and on with examples of some of the funny ways we talk but you would think I'm being unkind; probably funny but unkind.

While traveling in the U.S., we used to say that we're from Rhode Island, now we just say New England. I got tired of being asked "Isn't that an island off New York?" No, you geographically-challenged dumbbell, that's Long Island.

In my real estate business I often meet relocation clients; people who come from all over the United States and abroad. Eventually the conversation comes around to where I'm from. Usually when I say I'm a native Rhode Islander I hear "You don't sound like you come from Rhode Island." I usually say, thank you, thank you, I have worked to NOT sound like a Rhode Islander.

I used to have a friend who grew up in Brooklyn, New York, whose accent I found kind of cool. He knew I had worked on my 'accent' but every once in a while, usually when I was in a rant and got 'tawking' fast he would start to laugh. "What are you laughing at?" "You sound like you're from Rhode Island!"

Well, um, ya' know, like sometimes I just can't like help it.

It's a Small World After All

While reading Pam's post yesterday in Pam's Perspectives, I started thinking about the funny coincidences I've had running into people in places I didn't expect to. Being a real estate agent you count on what we call our sphere of influence to build business, so I usually enjoy it when I meet people I know or people who know people I know but I've had some really strange occurrences.

I live in the smallest state, Rhode Island. You know, the state that news people use as a unit of measure for things like "an iceberg the size of Rhode Island has broken off the coast of Alaska and is floating towards Hawaii" or "a forest fire three times the size of Rhode Island is raging in......" Those of us from the littlest state, with the biggest name I might add, get a little tired of that.

Yet many people don't even seem to know WHERE Rhode Island is! In our travels in the US we stopped answering Rhode Island when asked where we're from because we got sick of hearing "oh, isn't that the island off New York?" No, you dope, that's LONG ISLAND!

And then there's the guy you meet somewhere who says "My cousin's ex-husband is from Rhode Island, do you know him, his name is......?" While it's true there are only a million of us living here and I do know a lot of people, I don't know them all!!

But then there was the time in Italy about 5 years ago when Pam, of the aforementioned Pam's Perspectives, my BFF Gisele (I can use that, can't I?) and I were in a restaurant in Sorrento on the Amalfi Coast. A guy with a guitar was strolling around asking people where they were from. He asked a young couple sitting right next to us. The guy didn't answer The States or Rhode Island or New England he just said Woonsocket. What'd he say!? Woonsocket is a small mill city in northern RI and happens to be Gisele's hometown. What are the odds?

And then the lady working in the gift shop in Prescott, Arizona, who was from Oakham, Massachusetts. Oakham is a town of about 300 people and Paul's cousin and his family just happen to live there. Weird!

And the time Gisele and I were on the commuter bus to Providence talking about someone we knew in this family of 14 kids. The guy opposite us looked out from behind his newspaper and said "I heard my name, are you talking about my family?" (Ooops! What did we just say about that family??) Oh well, that's not such a small world story, after all there are 14 kids in the family, that's half a town in Rhode Island!

It's a Small, Small World.......


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