Here's My New Word

And the word is: Resolutionist. The definition is: A person who joins the gym in early January because of their New Years Resolution. Resolutionists can be spotted by their pasty white skin, excessive fat, poor form, and blank look on their faces as they stand next to any piece of gym equipment. Resolutionists usually migrate back to the couch any time from mid-January to early March.

That would not be me. I don't make resolutions of any kind, especially about exercise. That would just be setting myself up for failure. And exercise.

However, a couple months ago I bought a copy of the Biggest Loser's Weightloss Yoga DVD. The DVD sat in a drawer for a while and finally after the first of the year, I decided it was time.

I have been saying I need to get back into some kind of exercise routine for a while. Starting this blog was not good for that plan. I sit here far too much for my own good. Let me say that I hate exercise just for the sake of exercise. I like to keep moving if it's part of something else, but as for exercise routines, believe me I've tried them all.

First there was the Nordic Track. Remember the Nordic Track? Do they even sell Nordic Tracks anymore? Anywhere besides eBay or yard sales, that is? I bought one in my 20's. It was a BIG investment back then when the only way to get one was by ordering it over the telephone. I think it cost about $750 which was a lot of money.

My shiny new state-of-the-art Nordic Track arrived, and I HATED IT!! It was the most boring thing I had ever done. I had to pay myself to stay on the thing. Soon it became a very expensive clothes rack. I eventually sold it to a friend for about $300, and he took it home probably to be a clothes rack in his house.

Then there was the weight bench. In my early 30's I fell skiing and shattered my collar bone. It was a very bad break and didn't heal correctly. I probably should have had surgery but the doctor was an ass and didn't think it was necessary. Ultimately it wasn't that big a deal but it did result in some nerve damage. I ended up in therapy for strength training. I really liked weight training. Or maybe it was the body builder who trained me.

After discharge, I bought a weight bench and equipment that took up most of a room in our basement. I used it for a while. Paul used it for a couple years. He's very physically active and doesn't really need an exercise regimen to stay in shape. The bench hung around (again, a great spot to put hangers with clothes coming from the laundry) and we eventually sold it on eBay.

Then there was the treadmill. Another pricey piece of equipment. The treadmill bored me to tears, too, even with a television in front of me. Relegated to a corner of the exercise room, things piled up on it until another eBay sale.

At this point I vowed not to buy another piece of equipment. About ten years ago I joined a gym. Finally, success!! I was there for a couple years 2-3 times a week at 6 a.m. I was so proud of myself getting up and out on those days. I worked out alone for two mornings a week and then with a trainer once a week. That turned out to be the key. If I had an appointment, I was there.

My first trainer was Maureen. We got along well, and I really felt great. After a year or two, Maureen started having personal problems. I stuck with her, often listening to her troubles while I was paying her. Eventually she left the gym and moved out of state.

Then I began working out with Jay, another trainer. Jay was even better than Maureen. He made the workouts fun and effective. Then Jay left the gym and moved out of state. I tried not to take this exodus of my trainers personally but there were times I wondered. I didn't like any of the other trainers so that part of my routine languished. I continued on my own for a while then stopped. Always thinking I would go back, I continued to pay the monthly fee. For too long my money went to the gym, but I didn't.

So now I'll give yoga a shot. In keeping with my vow not to spend a lot of money, I bought the DVD, picked up an inexpensive yoga mat and some new workout clothes. I started using it three weeks ago and so far, so good. I'm trying to work out every other day. My muscles are sore so I must be doing something right. Now that I've made the public admission that I'm doing this, maybe I'll feel obligated to continue. We'll see!

Here's Lucy demonstrating the yoga Down Dog position. I think her form is better than mine. I know her muscles are.